The Painkiller Funda

The day was 1st of May and it was my husband’s birthday. Birthday wishes started pouring early in the morning from his friends and colleagues in the form of SMS and phone calls. At around 8’O clock, I was sipping my morning tea when the phone rang. It was Anindo-da his college friend. He gave his heart full wishes to Abhijit . They talked for over 15 minutes. I requested my husband  give me the phone as I wanted to talk to Sumita (Anindo da’s wife). He gave me the phone. Sumita is a sweet and intelligent lady about my age. She is one of those persons with whom I'm impressed “How are you and how is your family doing?” I asked her. She said “My family is fine by God’s grace and now I am alright as well." “NOW?” I asked. The word hit my brain it means she had something wrong in past. I asked her “What was wrong with you.?”

The she told me everything in detail that happened the day before yesterday. After dinner she had a bad tooth ache. It was already 10 pm. At this hour of the evening (actually night) she would not find a doctor for medical help. So she had to endure the pain. It was very difficult to sleep with the pain. She spent about one and half hour but neither there was even an ounce of relief nor could she sleep. Anindo-da was fast asleep. She got up from her bed and then sat down with her computer searching for an easy household remedy for tooth ache or some kind of pain relief. After a good search on internet she found a remedy.

The remedy was  - “If you have a tooth ache then rinse your mouth two or three times by whiskey.”

She came back to her bedroom and started searching for a bottle of whiskey in her husband’s almirah. Luck was on her side as she found a bottle. As I know them personally I knew Sumita never drank and Anindo-da does not drink on a regular basis, but he does indulge occasionally with his close friends. So Sumita took the bottle and came to the kitchen. She poured a good amount of whiskey in a glass then she took a mouth full of whiskey then she rinsed her mouth thoroughly and spit it in the sink. Mean while Anindo-da woke up and came to the kitchen. When Sumita was spitting he was shocked. He screamed, “What the hell are you doing??? Do you know this is one of the costliest whiskey and you are spitting it in the kitchen outlet?” Sumita was confused. After a mouth wash she was feeling good. This time she took another mouth full whiskey and rinsed her mouth. But this time instead of spitting out, she swallowed the whole amount. This time she felt better. She repeated this until the glass was finished. In her own language she told me “Entire kitchen was rotating ……I did not know what happened after that.” I asked her “How about your pain?” Sumita laughed and replied “What pain?? Yesterday I was suffering in headache but today I am perfectly alright.” I said “Sumita you truly valued your money."

1st lesson

One fine evening I and my son Pakku were arguing with each other, and the topic was why one should drink milk. I forced him to finish the milk and only then could he go to play. At this time my husband was watching cricket match on TV.

Suddenly my next door neighbor, Probhir-da came and directly asked me, “Do you want to learn car driving?” I knew in the year 1986 he had purchased a second hand car. The car was a Fiat Premier Padmini 1976 model. My first reaction was ‘I can’t believe that anyone would want to teach me car driving’, and my second reaction was, “Yes! I will!” I immediately got ready to go for a car driving lesson.

In the car I, my son, Maloti and her son sat down at the back seat, and Abhijit settled next to the driver’s seat. Probir was driving the car. Few minutes later, we reached the stadium.

The stadium was a huge circular playground, and the audience area consisted of 15-16 steps. The entry and the exit gates were separate. The exit was diverged away from the entrance area by a big white wall. This was to prevent unwanted crownding near the entrance gate.

On the way, my husband asked Probir-da, “Why do you want to teach Mini car driving?” Probir-da laughed and said “This is a strategy.” Maloti didn’t hear it, and I couldn’t understand it.

So in the stadium, Maloti, her son, Pakku and Abhijit sat down on the steps. I was in the car with Probir-da. I was in the driver’s seat and Probir-da was teaching me. “Look, this is the ignition key. From this the motor will start. This is the gear shaft, horn, accelerator, breaks and clutch...” and the theory continued. I turned the key and fired up the engine. Probir-da said “Take the gear and push the accelerator, leave the clutch gently”. I did as he told me to do. The motor car was now rolling on it’s wheels. My heart started pounding faster. My Blood pressure rose up. “Now change the gear.” I did the same “Now accelerate.” I pushed my foot on the accelerator. Now the car took speed and run nicely on the stadium ground. This time Probir-da said, “Mini, now change the gear.” I tried to follow his instructions, but the car stopped. Again I started from the beginning. The car ran again. Then Probir-da said, “Now concentrate on the steering wheel.” “Yes!” I replied confidently. Confidence was beaming out of me now. With confidence I pushed the accelerator so hard that the car took the speed of 100 Km/hr. This speed scared me. Right in front of me was the white wall, that was coming towards me in full speed. My heart was beating fast. “Now what should I do???” Probir-da was shouting and giving me a lot of instructions. But inside me my fuses were already blown out. I left the steering and shut my eyes tightly. Probir-da was still shouting beside me. “Leave the accelerator and push the break.” “I... I... I’m doing so.” I said faintly. He said in same tone. “NO! You have left the steering wheel.” Now I remember, I was pushing the accelerator. I pulled back my feet with the help of my hand. The car stopped just a few feet away from the white wall.

Behind the car Abhijit and Maloti were running. Both the kids were shouting as they ran behind Maloti. Probir-da got out of the car and bust out. “Shala! Onner bou, Na hole chore fele ditaam.” (Damn! Other’s wife, otherwise I would have thrown her out.)

Maloti opened the door and Pat my shoulder and asked “Are you alright?” I came out of the car and felt relieved. Maloti said, “So I’m not learning from this man. He is the worst teacher.”

After a long time I realized the strategy of Probir-da. He simply wanted to hurt Maloti’s ego. And he succeeded. Today Maloti is an excellent car driver.

Rock and Roll

In the industrial township, our routine was generally the same everyday. 8 o’ clock, all the men went to work, and generally all the ladies were busy in house hold work. Those days I was living on the first floor of a hostel block. There were six two room flats on each floor connected to each other by a 40 feet long lobby. Mostly at half past ten or eleven o’ clock, we ladies were extremely busy in preparing lunch and during this time period we let the kids out in the lobby where they used to play. Out of six families, which used to live on the first floor, only four families had kids. My family was among those four. All the kids were below three years of age. The youngest one was Barsha, just one year and five months old. Her mind and body was so fast that even her parents could not keep up with her, and naturally, had lot of problems managing her. So at about eleven o’ clock everyday, her mother habitually placed her in a walker and tied the walker with a strong rope. Rest of the three kids, including my son, would play and run around in the lobby. Poor Barsha, called them or shouted at them to draw their attention towards herself. I always felt bad for the poor girl. One or two times I asked her mother to untie her, but she said that she is not like other children. If she leaves her then she will surely fall down from the staircase. At that time I thought that though children are innocent and careless, they still have a basic instinct of safety. They don’t go near animals, objects or even places that scare them or will hurt them; like kids don’t go near fire or dogs. I thought that if the atmosphere around them is unknown, any kid would always stick with their parents. Everyday the three kids played. Many times their ball or toys would fall down the staircase but they never dared to climb the staircase down. In such situations they always asked for our help.

One day, out of mercy I untied Barsha. The moment I untied her walker, she tried to run and eventually fell down. I bent down to help her get up on her two legs, but before I could do that, she crawled out of the walker. Her mother was spreading a wet bed sheet on the lobby railing. Barsha started running with her full speed. Her mother screamed, “Oye! Barsha!!” I didn’t understand the situation at that instant. But soon I realized that Barsha was running towards the staircase. Her mother started running behind her. I was still confused but I decided to run after Barsha too. My speed was better than Barsha and her mother. Barsha’s mother was right. Barsha was heading towards the staircase. But before she could raise her feet in the air to step down on the staircase, I grabbed her. Her mother, who was also running to catch her couldn’t stop due to her sheer inertia. She jumped to avoid a collision and fell down the stairs.

Two days later, I made some hot soup for Barsha’s mother. I went to her flat. She was on the bed with blue and black patches on her thighs and back. She was very lucky (or insanely strong for that matter) that she didn’t have any of her bones fractured. She tried to sit up on the bed. I helped her and then fed her the soup. She finally said in a very faint voice, “Why did you untie her?” “I’m ashamed and genuinely sorry for what I’ve done.” I replied. From that day onwards, I promised myself that I would never interfere between ma and daughter.