Recently my husband got transferred from Varanasi to Anpara. I didn;t know anything about that place - where is was or how small or big that place was etc. After a good deal of research with different atlases, road maps, and search engines, I found it near Madhya Pradesh border in South U.P.
One fine morning I came to Anpara with him. We arrived at the guest house and he went off for his work place. I spent the whole day lethargically as I nothing to do. My mobile was discharged, so I couldn't even chat with my children or call up my friends in Varanasi or Haridwar. In the evening I put my sandal on and took a stroll outside. In front of the guest house there is a huge play ground. I couldn’t see a single child there - not even men or women. After about half a kilometer of walking I came across a hedge. Some kind of unknown sound drew my attention. I stopped there and tried to find out the source of the weird sound. “khachar pachar..oink..g..rrr.” I saw two groups of living being were fighting. There were five puppies and eight piglets. The pups & piglets were chasing each other’s group and a mock fighting was going on for their territory. I stopped there and was enjoying the fight. The mothers of two groups were unconcerned. Mother of the pups was scratching it-self by its hind leg and other group’s mother was searching food by pushing its nose in the dirt. After some time I returned to guest house. Abhijit came back and he offered me his mobile phone and said that my friend wanted to talk to me. I picked up phone. From the other side Dr. Mrs. Dutta was speaking. Dr. Mrs. S.Dutta alias Mimi is one of our very good friends. We were started talking. First she congratulated me for Abhijit’s promotion and said that now I can live like a queen. When I switched off the phone I realized that 20 minutes had past. The word ‘queen’ hit my brain. I asked myself “ Who am I ?”
When I was in class 6th, someone asked me my mother’s name. You can find it hard to imagine, but I didn't know it back then. Throughout my childhood I was taught “My father’s name is Mr. A. K. Mukherjee” but told me my mother's name. That day I asked my father and then I came to know Mrs. Prativa Mukherjee is my mother. Even in our high-school days there was no column for mother’s name.
After my marriage I came to my in law’s home, and immediately my identity was changed. Now I was "Banerjee saahab ki bahu" (Banerjee’s daughter in law). Then days passed and after a gap of time my identity changed again. Whenever my husband introduced me to any of his friend’s wife I directly asked her first name. I called them by their name instead of their husband’s surname. As time passed, my identity changed from Mrs. Banerjee to "Paku ki mummy" ( Paku’s mother). Then "Piku ki mummy" (Piku’s mother). Then "Pinky ki mummy" ( Pinky’s mother, Pinki is the name of my pet dog).
In my in law’s house, when we came back after 16 years, the people in the colony give me another identity and that was "26 number walli bhabiji" (lady of house no. 26th). So who am I ? Abhijit is a senior officer in a big organisation. He is an eligible man. He has worked hard to reach this post. I did nothing, but as his wife, I am enjoying the fruits of his success.
I am nothing without my loved ones. After all they all are part of my personality. But above all the identities, a little girl is still inside me. She never grows, she never falls sick, she never cries and she is simple and fearless... but never a queen!!! Never in my life.
One fine morning I came to Anpara with him. We arrived at the guest house and he went off for his work place. I spent the whole day lethargically as I nothing to do. My mobile was discharged, so I couldn't even chat with my children or call up my friends in Varanasi or Haridwar. In the evening I put my sandal on and took a stroll outside. In front of the guest house there is a huge play ground. I couldn’t see a single child there - not even men or women. After about half a kilometer of walking I came across a hedge. Some kind of unknown sound drew my attention. I stopped there and tried to find out the source of the weird sound. “khachar pachar..oink..g..rrr.” I saw two groups of living being were fighting. There were five puppies and eight piglets. The pups & piglets were chasing each other’s group and a mock fighting was going on for their territory. I stopped there and was enjoying the fight. The mothers of two groups were unconcerned. Mother of the pups was scratching it-self by its hind leg and other group’s mother was searching food by pushing its nose in the dirt. After some time I returned to guest house. Abhijit came back and he offered me his mobile phone and said that my friend wanted to talk to me. I picked up phone. From the other side Dr. Mrs. Dutta was speaking. Dr. Mrs. S.Dutta alias Mimi is one of our very good friends. We were started talking. First she congratulated me for Abhijit’s promotion and said that now I can live like a queen. When I switched off the phone I realized that 20 minutes had past. The word ‘queen’ hit my brain. I asked myself “ Who am I ?”
When I was in class 6th, someone asked me my mother’s name. You can find it hard to imagine, but I didn't know it back then. Throughout my childhood I was taught “My father’s name is Mr. A. K. Mukherjee” but told me my mother's name. That day I asked my father and then I came to know Mrs. Prativa Mukherjee is my mother. Even in our high-school days there was no column for mother’s name.
After my marriage I came to my in law’s home, and immediately my identity was changed. Now I was "Banerjee saahab ki bahu" (Banerjee’s daughter in law). Then days passed and after a gap of time my identity changed again. Whenever my husband introduced me to any of his friend’s wife I directly asked her first name. I called them by their name instead of their husband’s surname. As time passed, my identity changed from Mrs. Banerjee to "Paku ki mummy" ( Paku’s mother). Then "Piku ki mummy" (Piku’s mother). Then "Pinky ki mummy" ( Pinky’s mother, Pinki is the name of my pet dog).
In my in law’s house, when we came back after 16 years, the people in the colony give me another identity and that was "26 number walli bhabiji" (lady of house no. 26th). So who am I ? Abhijit is a senior officer in a big organisation. He is an eligible man. He has worked hard to reach this post. I did nothing, but as his wife, I am enjoying the fruits of his success.
I am nothing without my loved ones. After all they all are part of my personality. But above all the identities, a little girl is still inside me. She never grows, she never falls sick, she never cries and she is simple and fearless... but never a queen!!! Never in my life.
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